Thank you everyone for the thoughtful replies. This thread has been super helpful just to hear how guys with more experience would approach a problem like this.
An update: I talked with DP and we decided to find a middle-ground between the grade I'd already done and the reference. I ended just doing a few timeline-wide adjustments, instead of starting over. Added an inverted S-curve and toned down the saturation, mostly. Also a layer mixer node to push orange / blue set to low opacity (not sure if this best way of limiting color palette).
Here's the updated link : https://vimeo.com/549688308 (PW = HL)
A few questions
Santiago: when you say linear does that mean, like, rec 709? This was shot on the Red Dragon 6k and I graded under the Log3G10 to Rec709 LUT. Thing is, I did a bunch of "film emulation-esque" adjustments under the LUT before seeing the DPs reference film, so I kind of shot myself in the foot there! I imagine I could've gotten closer to the reference without doing those things.
Marc & Nicolas: I've heard of this parallel / layer node pulling. Just to clarify, the workflow would be something like: make a parallel node, with the top node as my "look" and the bottom node used to push skin more towards flesh tone? The idea being the parallel node will prevent the "look" node from effecting the skin, yes? I've tried this but I may be doing something wrong as it's never worked great for me. I'll look up tutorials and investigate but any quick pointers are definitely appreciated.
Thank you guys for taking the time,